Divorce is a traumatic process not just for parents but also for their children. To help children cope with the changes in their living arrangements once the courts have determined who will have custody of the children, parents can do the following:
“He makes me so angry”! “She is so unreasonable- no wonder we got divorced”! A good guess is that as a divorced parent you have made these statements – statements made in a tense situation involving visitation, custody or shared holidays. You divorced as a result of not being able to communicate, compromise, get along, and now, a divorce decree forces you to do all of these for your children.
As we enter the first month of 2018 this is a perfect time to reflect upon the past year and determine what really matters, who you want in your life, and how 2018 will be more abundant, peaceful and prosperous.
Whether an adult or child, adjusting through a divorce takes time. It’s hardest for everyone during the first year, when changes are new. Parenting through a divorce is the time to protect your children from whatever adverse conditions the divorce may impact.
If you or a loved one is going through a divorce, it can be a very difficult time. But it doesn’t necessarily have to. The American Psychological Association (www.apa.org) published the article below. The article provides tips about how to keep your divorce “healthy” and avoid the emotional and physical stress that can occur when going through a divorce.
How can divorce make you a better person? In many ways, surviving a divorce can make you a stronger, more capable person. We found a great article on www.womansday.com that provides some insight on how this experience can help improve your life in unexpected ways.
Even the most ‘friendly’ divorce can be stressful, whether you’re the one leaving or being left. There are so many things to think of and take care of like custody of any children involved, division of joint property, and the long term financial effects of going from either two paychecks to one, or from one to just alimony and/or child support. As well as other things that can cause stress, such as how the friends and family react (i.e. if they choose sides) finding a new place to live and possibly a new school for the kids…the list goes on and on.
Divorce is never easy for any family, especially if you have adult children. When children are older, they have already had longer-established family rituals and memories. Divorce can cause much more of an impact on adult children than on younger children.
Adjusting to a new year is compounded by the stress of finding a new life after divorce. You can make the transition more positive by implementing New Year resolutions as a way to overcome the upheaval of your former life.